Tuesday 29 March 2016

Spring Cleaning

Spring is upon us, and not an instant too soon. This winter has summoned an unprecedented level of grumbles and grievances to which I have been needlessly exposed. It seems that certain elements of society are not only challenged by bodily ailments incurred during a spate of frost, and heating bills doubtless due to inefficient budgeting, they insist on vocalising their petty complaints. Even an amble into the village this week was spoilt by a quite unnecessarily public bemoaning. In all likelihood I shall not venture to the Library again for witnessing such negative attitudes at close quarters ruined my day. My book recommendations will henceforth be entrusted with the Royal Mail.

            On a more positive note, the change of season also instigates our annual spring clean. And not before time. When I last embarked upon an impromptu inspection, albeit more exhaustive than usual, of Farthing Hall, I was dismayed to discover that dust mites have infiltrated my crevices to an alarming degree bringing to my formal quarters an unacceptable level of what I am forced to concede is filth.

            However, the staff have now been summoned and assigned their duties and, with a concerted effort by everyone, The Hall should be in tip top condition within the week. I believe I can rely upon their sense of duty, despite their lack of verbal acquiescence.

            Of course, some furnishings - I am referring specifically to those silk drapes which bedeck the White Drawing Room - remain in pristine condition but then I have lavished much personal attention upon them. Given the self imposed task last year of arranging importation of the fabric from those industrious little fellows in the Far East I felt it necessary to maintain and monitor their allure myself. There is nothing more beneficial than regular hand treatment, as The Master frequently testifies.

            Yet it is not my duty to oversee every cleansing and polishing task that encompasses the Gosworthy-Pringle pile. An abundance of my time is already allotted to charity commitments on top of which my numerous social obligations make daily supervision of domestic duties simply impracticable.  

            No, it is beholden upon my employees to respect the standards I prescribe. And for which they are adequately rewarded, I might add. I trust they will put my instructions into practise though I will, however, note all neglected areas and include details of any lapses in the relevant staff appraisals.